I'm not giving up - I just want to rest for a bit


Other people said that I'm a failure because I failed to fulfill my duties and responsibilities, yes that's true I failed but I did my best to achieve success, however I'm only human. I have limited strength and I have unlimited weaknesses. I can't stay up late at night without resting for the whole day, means 24 hours active it can malfunctions my brain and damage some of my organs. I can't handle many problems because my mental health is weak especially when I don't have enough rest. I can't walk in a long distance because I can easily get tired. I'm not that strong just like other people I have teary-eyes every time they throw a hurtful words at me. Yes I'm weak but you know what hurts me the most when no one's there beside me, when no one's there to hear me, when no one's there to make me happy, when everyone is disappointed at me, well I need to endure the pain, I need to cry out loud to lessen the burden that I have inside of me.


I want to rest cause I can't take this anymore, I want to build again my broken pieces, I want to love myself and let go the pain I'm carrying, I need to recover so that I'll be able to move again. Luckily someone gave me my wish but in one condition, I need to come back after I recover. I need to continue my battle, for some reason it make sense and it means a lot to me. I know that in this world I can't avoid challenges because humans are born to experience the success and failure and if you succeed good for you but if not you need to continue. I am not required to quit in fact, quitting is not on my vocabulary so I have to face the reality and crazy journey called "life". For all the people who expected a lot from me "sorry" is the only word I can give, I hope all of you will understand my side someday. It is hard for me to do this but I will, I will accept the fact that you all abandoned me and the only thing that I have is myself so, I will love my whole self.

My whole existence reminds me that I'm such a strong person not because of my skills and abilities but because of my fighting spirit. I am able to surpassed the challenges and enjoy those comings. I'm so proud of myself, lesson if you get tired, rest, but not to quit.

by Shania Queen G. Arangorin


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