Life is too short to waste our time on people who don't respect, appreciate, and value us. Too much of the time, we are blinded by our own pursuits of people to like us, people who don't even matter. Even if we cannot change all the people around us, we can change the people we choose to be around.
So many people walk around with a meaningless life. We cannot control the behavior of others, but we can always choose how we respond to it. Before we can change others, we need to change ourselves first. Stepping onto a brand-new path is difficult, but not tougher than remaining in a situation.
Happiness depends on our mindset and attitude. We all make mistakes, so just put it behind us. We should regret our mistakes and learn from them, but never carry them forward into the future with us.
Change cannot be forced upon people. But behaviors and cultures can be shaped and guided.For example, when others try to influence our decisions, we don't just go along, we push back against the persuasive attempt.We avoid doing what is suggested because we don't want to feel like other people is controlling us.
Now, if telling people to do doesn't work, what does? Rather than trying to persuade people to change, getting them to persuade themselves is often more effective. Or, better yet, be the change that you want. You can model the behavior for others to follow.
People strive for internal consistency. They want their attitudes and actions to be aligned. Highlighting misalignment encourages them to resolve the gap. By doing this, you can increase people's sense of freedom and control by pointing out a disconnection between their thoughts and actions, or between what they might recommend for others versus themselves.
By encouraging people to articulate their opinion, they've had to put a stake in the ground to admit that those things aren't good for them. And once they've done that, it becomes more difficult to keep justifying the bad behaviors. Rather than counter-arguing about all the reasons they disagree, they're sorting through their answer and their feelings on the matter.
Try to have an effective listening skills/ It encourages people to commit to the conclusion, because while people might not want to follow someone else's lead, they're more than happy to follow their own.
It is undeniable, however, that some individuals do change, and the change that takes place in them shows that it is not at all an impossible. However, both the will and the way are necessary for successful behavior change. But even in that case, it can be useful to acknowledge the distinction between the two and address them separately.
When we encourage people to change, we need to be the change that we seek. If not, we will end up frustrated and disgusted for not able to make a difference out of other people's behavior.